Saturday, July 7, 2012

my Mommy, Angie

i moved away from "home" a few years ago.  i often look back and think of my Mommy, Angie.  she gave me strength and courage, and She healed a very lost little girl inside.  In our relationship, She gave me the tools i needed to move forward and grow.  i am in a different place in my life desires have changed and have matured, but i can't help but think of my Beautiful Mommy and all She did for me during the time we shared.  i am forever grateful, and i will Always Love You.

Your babygirl,

Thursday, June 28, 2012


You know...comments would be graciously accepted.  i know You're reading.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

The Belt...

You made me instantly wet when You told me i was getting a spanking. Your tone let me know i wasn't in real, Real's just that You were in one of those wicked moods. As i lay there with my face burried in Your pillows, breathing Your scent, i'm tuned to every syllable leaving Your lips... "sly? you are to count out each lash. Understood?" "yes, Ma'am!" oooo...You Know i can't stand to count out lashes! And since You aren't real, Real mad at me, and it's just kindof a "Fun" spanking... "One!" That first lash was a bit alarming, but if there were any doubts before, i Knew this was just a fun spanking... Next lash... a giggley "One!" "Oh....really, sly? Lost count already?" And another, harder lash comes whipping down across my ass... "lol....ONe!" You kinda laugh and rise to the challenge...a little harder. "OMG! ....ONE!" "Damnit! ...ONE!" "ONE!" "ONE!" "ONE!" "FUCK!! OOOOOOONE!" my voice is cracking. i feel the heat on my ass rising, and i'm starting to break a sweat... Each lash gets a bit harder than the last. It's become a test of the wills at this point. Principle... Another CRACK, and i caught a glance of Your face. i knew You weren't amused anymore. i cry out "TWO!" and begin to get a bit weepy...wanting to cry...needing too, but still not quite to the point i could let go. "THREE!...MsHope!" "FOUR!!...i'm Sorry!" "FIVE!!....Pleassssse!" "Please, What, sly? I have your attention now?" "OH GOD!....SIX! yes, Ma'am!" and i start to weep. "Good." You say... "SSSSSSSSEVENNNN!!!" "Hush, sly! No more talking! No more counting!" "CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK..." And i didn't say a word. i cried.

Monday, April 16, 2012

The Dream...

i don't remember falling asleep last night. i just stopped for a moment and layed down on the bed. Next thing i know, it was 5:30 in the morning. i was still laying in the same spot, hadn't moved, fully dressed...even still had my shoes on. i was Tired! i slept sound and deeply. In doing so, i went to a blissful place in my mind...

i was at a party, and You were both there. i was sitting on the couch, really close and comfortable with You. Nothing more than friends enjoying each others company. At one point, i had gone into another room, and i found myself leaning against the fire place mantle, elbows on the mantle, looking behind me in the big mirror that was hung above the fireplace...

i saw Her walk up behind me and i couldn't help the smile that came across my face. She was not as amused. She wasn't mad or angry or anything, but you could tell She had a bad taste in Her mouth for me. She took advantage of the position i was in, and without a word from either of us, She was there to put me in my place...

i'm not sure how it happened, because my shirt was still on, but my shoulders were exposed. There were people walking around, mingling, but no one was really paying any attention to us. She had a wire coat hanger in Her hand. It was straightened out and doubled over. She was going to punish me...She did not like me at all, and i could feel it. But i also needed to submit to Her. i wanted to! i've Always wanted to...

She struck my shoulders with the piece of wire. i didn't even flinch. It hurt! But it was like a hunger being fed. my soul drank it up like nourishment. Another quick, sharp strike came down across my skin, and i felt like i had taken my very first breath of life. With my head bowed, i looked into the mirror through a part in my hair that had fallen over my face and gazed at Her with a sly grin and passion in my eyes. She Glared back at me, and i saw Her draw back once again and She came down on my back so hard, the wire molded itself to the shape of my shoulder and back. She held it up and looked at it and laughed at it's shape before She threw it down to reach for Her next weapon. It was a riding crop. She gave me a moment and guided me in a more braced position, took aim and i felt the thudded sting sink deep into my flesh. She was making Her point! Another blow and i hissed and buckled into the mantle, making sure to keep my position, but i was starting to feel the rawness of Her fury.

By the third strike, i felt something had changed in Her. She didn't seem as..."mad" at me. It had somehow turned from a punishment into a acceptance of what She was to understanding of who i was to Her... She was enjoying this exchange in a whole new manner than She was when it started out. She realized i was Hers...and She hadn't even known She wanted me!

i felt Her tugging at my shirt to expose more of my skin. She was actually ripping the back of my shirt open. She had a red candle in Her of those big fat ones that you set down in a glass globe. i saw the flicker of the fire and the melted wax as She made one last check that my shirt had been properly cleared out of Her way. i must admit, i was worried how that hot wax was going to feel on top of my burning welts. i could already feel the heat rising from the attention She'd already given me. But there was something very comforting when i felt the warmth ooze down and trickle across my wounds. Something inside me changed...i can not even articulate the feelings of elation that i was experiencing. And in the middle of my euphoria, She turned my face to Hers from behind to kiss Her. i did. She offered me Her tongue, and i gently sucked it into my mouth. i could feel all the details of Her kiss with my tongue...Her taste buds, Her breath....Intoxicating! Her tongue was much wetter than it would normally be...more so than i would normally want to kiss...but She had done it on purpose...for me to take and savor, and i couldn't' get enough. She breaks our kiss for a moment to wet Her tongue again and offers it to me once again. i seductively kiss Her and it rocked me to my core. After a moment, She pulls away, takes a fist full of my hair into Her hand, pulls my head back and whispers in my ear, "Don't Touch My Husband..."

i became instantly conscious at that moment. i wasn't awake, but i was no longer dreaming either. my heart was racing. my breathing was rapid. i just layed there savoring every moment that had just transpired in my head. i wished for my dream to come true...



Sunday, January 8, 2012

Some of this stuff is just Stupid...

Haven't been here in awhile, and came on today, briefly read through a couple of my postings and realized how stupid i sound.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Late Again!

For my Ma'am...

i was 30 minutes late coming to meet her. She had made dinner plans with some of her friends she wanted me to meet. She'd been looking forward to this gathering all week long and reminded me earlier in the day, "Don't be late!"

i was stuck in traffic on 285. i thought i'd be able to use that as an excuse. The entire time Knowing what she was going to say to that. "You should have Planned for traffic and left Earlier, rayn!" And she would be right. i ran into some friends of mine, and i was engrossed in conversation and lost track of time. And what's worse...this is not the first time this has happened...

my heart was pounding when i pulled in the driveway. i knew Ma'am was going to be livid, and rightfully so! i can't Believe i'm late anyway...i Knew how important this was to her.

i parked the car and made my way to the house quickly. When i opened the door, all i saw was her hand reaching out for me. She grabbed me by my arm and pulled me in the house and started whipping me with her belt all the way down the hallway, into my room. She was scolding me, telling me "You Know how important this dinner is to me! What Were You Thinking!!" She yanked down my shorts, panties and all, threw me across the bed and spanked my ass hard with that damn belt.

Suddenly she stopped, pulled me back to my feet and told me to get ready. And "HURRY/CRACK!" She already had what she wanted me to wear all laid out. She continued spanking me the whole time i was getting dressed telling me how "Lucky/Crack you Are/Crack that we have to BE/Crack! somewhere! Oooo!! sly! Crack Crack just Wait/Crack! until we get home, girl! You are in So/Crack Much/Crack TROUBLE/CRACK!!"

i am finally dressed and ready to leave the house. i hear her high heals clicking down the hallway, and she's dugging around in her purse. She stops me in the living room and yanks my pants down one more time, bends me over the arm of the couch and spreads my cheeks. "Here. Take this." As she presses the remote control bullet into my bottom until i open up and accept it, taking it from her fingertips. "You're going to wear this tonight, and you better not make a Sound when i turn it on. Do You Understand?" "yes Ma'am!" "Good. Because that's Nothing compared to what's going up that little ass when we get home. Now, get in the car! We are Late!"


Someone New...

i felt something was wrong. We had been emailing most all day, with great enthusiasm, and then suddenly, the emails stopped. And when she did write back, it was short and to the point. i felt something was wrong, but then wrote it off as to her husband must have come home, or she's busy with a business matter, or she just had things to do. i didn't even fathom the thought that she was upset with me! She said i disappointed her because i am still seeking someone to spank me. i didn't even know what she was talking about until i started answering her emails. Then it hit me...i never deleted my personal ad once we started talking. It didn't even occur to me to delete it. i have been running ads for awhile now, and i usually just let them run until they expire. That has just been my practice. It's been so long, and to find someone of any substance on the internet was going to be a long shot anyway, i'd just become jaded with the entire concept. But then, out of nowhere, there she was. Someone i feel i've been looking for for quite some time. Like i said, we'd been talking all day, trying to get to know one another. Everything she's said has been right on with me. Anything i've been leary of, she's listened and taken into consideration and made sure i felt safe and secure about my concerns. i am very interested in pursuing this relationship to see where it takes us, so i was quite shocked when she said she was unhappy with me right now. i didn't understand why...

But now i know, and of course she's upset. i would be too if i had seen that her ad was still running after talking to her all day. What i should have done was remove the ad immediately, once i realized this might be a real connection. But i didn't. Instead, she found my ad again, thought the worst and had bad feelings about it all evening. She lost interest in me. She must have thought i was a player...that i wasn't interested...or maybe that i was just not serious about this at all.

Whatever she felt, luckily she mentioned it to me, and i was able to explain to her that i am not looking for anyone else. i understand how my actions, or rather, a lack there of, turned a really good day into sadness and disappointment. That is not something Ma'am is going to allow, and i'm going to be punished for being so thoughtless...

When i get to her house, she takes me by the wrist and walks me down the hall to her study. She tells me, in a very stern voice, to strip from the waist down, and i do. She tells me she has a few questions for me, and This is going to be how the interrogation goes in this house... She bends me over her desk and spreads my legs apart. She take my hands and puts them behind me, pinning them in the small of my back with her hand. With her other hand, she parts my cheeks and presses her finger against my anus. "Now, miss rayn. Can you please tell me why you didn't delete your ad until I called you out?" As she spoke, the pressure she was putting on my bottom with her finger was increasing. Her tone was so strict, i was so nervous, i was afraid nothing was going to come out of my mouth once i did try to speak. i know my face was on fire from the shame, but i did. i managed to open my mouth and squeak out an answer for her. "i-i didn't' even think about it, Ma'am. It didn't even cross my mind at this point to delete the ad." And once i finished my sentence, i felt her finger slid deep inside me. Instantly, i was Her's, and i knew it. There was no question of who's girl i was at that moment. She was serious, and she was Not Happy with me, but nonetheless, i was her's, and it was time she proved it to me.

She proceeded to lecture me, Scolded me...and with each point she made, she emphasized it by trying to go deeper inside me...which she couldn't, but the pressure of her trying almost lifted my feet off the ground. i felt an ache deep within my soul, and she had total control over me. She went on to tell me that i was going to be spanked, Hard! That i wouldn't soon forget to not be so careless and thoughtless after this lesson. i was concentrating on everything she said along with the pain she was inflicting inside me, knowing that this was only the beginning of my punishment.

After some time, she stands me back on my feet, her finger still inside me, and she walks me over to the corner and sticks my nose in and tells me to stand still and not to move until she calls for me. i said, "yes Ma'am." and then with one fast motion, she jerks her finger out of me and i hear her walk into the other room to prepare for the rest of my punishment...

i heard her come back into the room. She didn't say a word. i heard her take a seat across the room, and then the silence became very loud. i could feel her staring at me. i could just imagine what was going through her mind. She must be contemplating what else she's going to do to me.

After what seemed like an eternity (although it was only about ten minutes) she called me out of the corner and told me to come "Here," as she pointed to the spot in front of her where she was sitting on the couch. i did. i stood in front of her with my hands to my sides, head and eyes down, waiting for her next instruction. She started scolding me again...about how my actions ruined what should have been a perfect day for her. As she scolded, she casually reached between my legs and checked to see if i was wet. i was. i thought i saw a slight grimace on her face when she felt what she had done to me already, But before she pulled away, she gave my pussy a firm spank and told me i Better be paying attention to her. and i was!

That's about the time she pulled me across her lap and started telling me what a bad little girl i was, and how she was going to make me a sorry little girl now. i felt her leg swing across my calf as she took my one arm and put it behind me. my other hand was already blocked by her body, but i could tell by the hold she was getting on me, she was about to spank my ass seriously hard, and she was making sure i wasn't going to squirm and wiggle my way away from her punishment. Her intention was to make sure that this didn't happen again, and that i remembered to be more thoughtful when it came to her feelings, and it was also to make sure, if i had any doubts at all at this point, that i was, in Fact, HERS, and Hers alone.

The spanking started. It was her hand. A very fitting, personal, intimate spanking with her hand. She reiterated that NO ONE else is ALLOWED to Spank my ass or put anything in it except Her and my girlfriend...i was Hers now, and i Better Not Forget! She goes on to tell me how i Will behave, and i Will do as she says, and if i don't, i Will get more of this and even worse, and the spanking kept coming. i could feel her handprints all over my ass. It Hurt! my bottom was on Fire, and as much as i wanted to wiggle my way out of it, she had such a hold on me, i could barely even move. All i could do was lay there and take all of what she wanted to give to me. i was promising and apologizing and Begging her to please stop spanking me, but it just kept coming. my ass was so red that it was almost numb at this point. i was so very sorry for what i had done. And not just because i was getting spanked. my heart really was broken that i hurt her like i did. i didn't mean it. And it wasn't going to happen again.

She had stopped spanking me a few moments before i realized she had stopped. She let me stay across her lap and cry it out for a moment. And i know it may sound strange, but her letting me lay there like that brought a great comfort to me, and i knew i had paid the price for my unthoughtfulness. i also knew, undoubtedly, that i was Her girl, and that made us both very happy. She spanked me back to my good girl status, and all would be forgiven.

Thank you, Ma'am.